It's Not My Area
by Carter and Nox THE TWINSIES
Summary: Carter and Nox Moriarty always knew they were adopted. But when they sneak out of Jim's flat, they get to know their real parents. But... Sherlock Holmes? Really? (A bit of crack!) (Sorry guys, terrible at writing summaries... first story by Carter and Nox.. no hate, but constructive critisicm is appreciated!)
1. Prologue

**It's Not My Area**

**By: CH and NH**

**Or NH and CH, but who even cares?**

**Time: After "The Hounds Of Baskerville", but before "The Reichenbach Fall"**

_**Prologue—12 Years Before Our Story Begins**_

Molly Hooper was frustrated with herself for letting this happen. She sat outside on the front steps of her house with nervously shaking hands. The social worker she had called pulled into her driveway, and a man stepped out of the sleek black car.

He was here to collect her children.

Molly had been just about forced to call the services because she just couldn't handle twins without the father. They had been an accident, and she wasn't brave enough to tell him what had happened. He had unknowingly named one of them—Nox, the spell, which turns out the lights in one of his many favorites of books. Molly, however, named Carter. Carter was the place where she had first met the father- Carter's Bookstore, right next to where she worked, St. Bartholomew's.

Molly snapped out of her reminiscing as the man from the social services came up to her. He wore a suit and sunglasses, which Molly was fine with, since she figured social workers dressed "Where are the children?" He asked.

"Inside, sleeping. I'll go get them for you." She replied.

Molly went inside and retrieved young Carter and Nox. She kissed them on the forehead softly, whispered her goodbye, and took them outside to the man. The man took them from her.

"Thank you ma'am, that'll be all." He said firmly.

"And they'll be safe from harm with you guys?" She questioned.

"Of course. Goodbye, Ms. Hooper."

With that, the man strode towards his car, stepped inside with the children, and left.

Molly stared at the place where the car disappeared with her children. After awhile, she stood and went inside. That's that, she thought. And that's surprisingly all she thought. She didn't realize the man didn't show her his identification like he should. She didn't realize that the man turned the wrong way as she left. No, Molly Hooper noticed none of these things. She was too depressed and frustrated with herself for not being brave enough to tell the father about them.

The man knew this and took advantage of it.

And in his car, with the two children, Jim Moriarty smirked.


	2. Chapter 1: Around 12 Years Later

** Carter and Nox just need a mo' to say thank you for all the reception! :D You guys are awesome! **

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**Chapter 1- Around 12 Years Later-In Which We Play Climb a Lamppost and Play the Violin**

Carter Moriarty sat in her "guardian's" living room on the couch next to her sister Nox. She stared at her quantum physics book before her. It was worn from the many times she read it, and the thing she next said was her mood.

"Bored."

"Dull." Came the reply from her sister Nox, who was currently fingering a rifle. Click, scrape, click. (They knew what their "guardian" did, they just didn't ask for details from the assassin. Who would?)

"It was 11 o'clock on a Friday evening, and Jim was in his study. What to do? Two geniuses had to have some sort of entertainment.

"Sneak off?"

"Of course."

Jim didn't really care when they snuck off, as long as they don't shoot his security system, like Carter did the first time. Boy, was he mad. He allowed them to come and go as often as they like, with whatever they wanted.

Nox grabbed a pistol for Carter (for defense, of course, they didn't want to kill anybody, unless needed), some food, and a med kit, just in case. Carter was grabbing some dark clothes, their phones (GPS removed) and flashlights for the night. Then, they disabled the security system ("We didn't shoot it," Carter argued to herself.) and left. They didn't plan on coming back this time.

"So, to the normal place?" Nox asked Carter.

"Sure, why not? 221 B Baker Street it is!" She replied.

Nox and Carter normally sat on top of the lamppost (yes, the lamppost) outside the flat when no cars were parked there. Surprisingly, even this late at night, when no one was normally there. They knew of Sherlock Holmes as Jim's "archenemy" of course, but they never saw his address, or what he looked like. Maybe if they did, their fate would have completely changed. But—as I said before, the twins didn't ask for details.

So, of course they didn't know where they were lurking every other day.

As they made their way up their lamppost talking to each other casually, Carter, who was going up second, and therefore looking up to talk to Nox noticed something she was oblivious to before.

"What's that man doing on **_our_** lamppost?!" Nox's head snapped up to above her. Indeed, a tall man with dark curly hair, a long trench coat, a purple-blue scarf and, judging by the smirk on his face, also enjoyed an ego the size of Jupiter was sitting on top of their haunting place, with a violin.

"What are you doing on our lamppost?" Nox repeated to the man.

"Correction," the man with extreme self-satisfaction said smugly. "What are you doing on my lamppost?"

"Well sir, it helps us think," said Nox seriously. "Wait, what do you mean your lamppost? 221B only owns the property within the flat."

"Sir, _**deducing**_ that you are the owner of the flat of 221B, do you have a violin?" called up Carter.

"Yes." The man said simply.

"Darn it, I should have stolen it earlier,"

"I did. A few seconds ago." Nox said.

"You nicked it and didn't tell me?" Carter asked, a bit ticked at her sister now, which she normally wasn't. "I could have played Beethoven's 6th!

"Ah. Maybe I should have told you."

"Shut up."

"Never."

"Excuse me," the man on the lamppost interrupted. "But who are you?"

"I'm Nox, and this is my sister Carter." said Nox.

"Got a last name?"

"Yes." replied Carter.

"And that is?"

"Do you need to know?" said Nox extremely irritatingly.

"No. You are obviously the responsibility of Jim Moriarty." said the haughty man.

"Not as slow as we thought then, eh Nox?" responded Carter.

"Perhaps, but it did take him a while." argued Nox. "And you are Sherlock Holmes. Our paternal unit's archenemy."

"Obviously." Carter and Mr. Holmes said together.

"Are you wearing my scarf?" Sherlock said to Carter.

"It's my scarf, thank you very much," replied she. "It was given to me when I was a baby."

"I think I should have it," Nox muttered under her breath. "It's my favorite color."

"It's my favorite color too! Just because you got the trench coat..."

Their dispute was interrupted by a man sticking his head out of one of the top windows in 221B.

"Sorry for stopping your fight here, but I really must wonder what you're doing on my lamppost." the man said quite indignantly.

"Not your property!" Nox and Carter said in unison, exhausted by the two times they had to explain their right to be there.

But the man would not take it.

"Where are your parents?" he asked, confused.

"Well, judging on the past moments of our conversation here..." Nox began.

Carter finished her sentence."He's just above us."

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**Okay, yes, we know there isn't a lamppost... and we don't really care either.**

**Thanks for reading!**

**:)**

**-Carter and Nox Holmes **

**P.S Reviews much appreciated.**


	3. Chapter 2: A Row in 221B

**Hey guys, Carter Holmes here! Thanks to everybody for the positive reception! You asked for more, we gave you more!**

**Nicolive- Thanks for reviewing! Posted this up early for ya!**

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**Chapter 2- In Which We Cause Our Dad To Nearly Jump Of His Skin (Multiple Times)**

"WHAT?" was heard immediately after those last comments coming from the window and the top of the lamppost.

"John, do try to keep up," said Carter.

"When did I introduce myself again?" John asked quizzically.

"You didn't," said Nox.

"But it was quite an easy deduction to make," continued Carter.

"Did you just say that I was your father?" asked Sherlock quite confused for once.

There was a pause.

John, sensing this awkward moment, said, "Erm, let's all come inside," gesturing to the door.

So, the strange foursome made their way into 221. They quickly moved their way up the steps of 221A, where was sleeping. Carter and Nox let out a very cliche gasp as they saw the strange mess before them.

"Yeah, it's messy, we know," said John, self deprecatingly.

"Are you kidding me?" asked Nox.

"Its-" began Carter, Nox joining in, strangely singing:

"TOTALLY AWESOME!"

Sherlock just crossed his arms, still a bit in shock. He should've had an orange blanket, and the picture would've been complete.

"So, where will we sleep?" said Nox matter-of-factly.

"Yes, I wouldn't mind sleeping on the couch." Carter informed the pair.

"What's for dinner? Will you feed us, or will we feed ourselves?" Nox asked, hopefully; as Jim Moriarty had never fed them in their lives. "And, father?" Nox started-

"Who is our mum?" finished Carter.

"Ooh... Sherlock!" John said in an accusatory, singsong tone.

"Shut up, John," Sherlock replied. "And I don't know who your mother is, and I'm not your father."

"Denial." said the twins.

"AM NOT!"

"ARE TOO!"  
"Sorry to interrupt-" started John, "but the twins are right, we should go talk to Molly."

"MOLLY?!" yelled Sherlock.

"MOLL-" began the twins, copying their dad. "Wait... who's Molly?"

"Well, Molly is Sherly's coworker, at the lab. The pathologist. Helps us on our cases sometimes," said John.

Sherlock mumbled something.

"What, Sherly?" said John.

"Don't call me that!" the other man now exclaimed, sounding much like a whiny six-year- old. His pout completed the look. The two began to have a row.

Carter and Nox plopped down onto the couch, side by side. This was going to be a long night.

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**Hey, Carter again. Just wanted to say that we'll be posting the next chappie soon... as soon as we *ahem, cough cough* finish it. Keep spraypainting your smiley faces!**

**CH**

**If anyone got the strangely singing reference, you are awesomer than... Redvines! :)**

**P.S Hint, hint: More reviews=Faster writing!**


	4. Chapter 3: Meeting Molly Hooper

******'Ello, readers! Carter again. 'Fraid I mostly wrote this chappie. Nox has called the next one though, so you'll be getting more of her writing soon! **

**-CH**

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**Chapter 3-In Which We Meet Our Mother, And Terrify Her Out Of Her Wits**

When there was a pause in the row, the twins quickly intervened from their spot on the couch.

"Pardon us," Nox started.

"But really, we need to meet Molly," finished Carter.

John looked a bit embarrassed.

"Oh...yes... she should still be at the morgue..."

"At two in the morning?" asked Carter.

"Or not..."

They decided to check anyway, and to no one's surprise, she wasn't there. But the twins thought the morgue was cool though (which worried John a fair amount). So the Holmes found her address and broke into her bedroom (much to John's disapproval) where she was sitting on her bed with her laptop, typing furiously.

Sherlock, who has no sense of discretion, stormed right up to her and started quite calmly, "Molly," but soon he escalated, "Who the **** are these kids!?" Molly just gaped at him.

John took a gentler approach. "Hello Molly. Would you do us all a favor and explain what happened approximately..." he turned to the twins. "How old are you?"

"Twelve," said Nox.

"And a half," continued Carter. John turned back to Molly.

"Twelve and a half years ago?"

Molly gaped further and spluttered, "Sh-Sherlock... b-b-bookstore... Carter... Nox... social worker...gone! Eventually she broke down crying.

Sherlock, the main highly functioning sociopath finally realized that he must of hurt the woman's feelings, because he turned to John and asked, "Not good?"

"No, Sherlock Idiot Holmes," he replied, temper rising. "Not good."

...

One long explanation of how the offspring of Molly Hooper and Sherlock Holmes came to have a pair of twins later, the children themselves were beginning to get tired. Normally they could run on about 2-4 hours of sleep each day (not recommended), but they figured tonight was an exception to the rule. We really need to get some sleep, thought Nox. They had quite zoned out on their mother's explanation. Frankly, they didn't really care. And since they are writing this story, thank you very much, Nox won't bore you with her thoughts on the matter and all of the details. Details, details. Earth going round the sun? Details. How their parents met? Details. It doesn't really matter. Things would still be the same anyway. Sorta like those lyrics to that "Queen" song... what was it? "Bohemian Rhapsody"? Nox remembered now. "Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter". She was sure Carter was thinking the same thing.

...

Actually, Carter was busy thinking how she had missed the last Doctor Who episode, and how she really needed to catch up, but it was close enough.

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**Hello others who may be reading our works, I am Nox Holmes, another writer of this compilation. We thank you for reading and positively reviewing us. Please enjoy and take lightly our writing, as it is our first officially published work. Thank you again, and have a nice first day of the rest of your life.**

**-NH**

**Oh, and thanks to Carmen and May, our beta readers, for editing and pointing out our mistakes and keeping us going with our writing (No matter how many times Carmen decides to put the lyrics to "I Can Swing My Sword" by Tobuscus in the orginal document when we are not looking!)**

**-CH**


	5. Chapter 4: Moriarty at Molly's

**Chapter 4-Moriarty at Molly's**

"Molly, no matter how intelligent you may be, you are an idiot." Sherlock complained, utterly dissatisfied with her observational skills, "You just gave away your children to a random stranger, without even asking for identification? Really, try to think when you do things. Did you even ask his name? You are so-"

We never got to hear what Sherlock thought of Molly, because just then the twins surrogate paternal unit (replacement dad) opened the door on the five-some. "Hello, everyone. Are you having a party? Without me? That isn't very polite, now is it? Such a nice family reunion. So sweet, it brings tears to my eyes." Said he, calmly, mockingly, "Oh Sherlock! You aren't untouchable after all. How disappointing. I had hoped we would end up being the same. But no, you are just like all the dull, ordinary people."

Sherlock, who was quite obviously furious at his archenemy, silently thought of a retort. Carter, Nox, and John were laughing their heads off, because they could easily see how Jim Moriarty was playing with Sherlock's mind, using our hero's most prominent weakness. His disturbingly large ego.

Sherlock composed himself, death glared his companions, and said, "Hello Jim, I am sorry to say, but I disagree with your assessment of myself and this situation. I cannot be truthfully described by words such as, 'dull', nor am I remotely 'ordinary'. I am Sherlock Holmes, and I would very much like you to leave. Go." He drew a pistol from his coat, and pointed it at the highly composed Moriarty. "Now, now, I just came looking for my lovely little children. No need to get violent." he said with dry sarcasm. Molly fainted. John pulled out a handgun, and the twins produced an assortment of weapons, including blowguns and crossbows. Our favorite psychopath (psychopath, not sociopath. There is a difference) blinked, and the lasers from snipers positioned nearby appeared all over the Holmes family, the fainted Molly, and 'Uncle John'. "Well this is a pickle, isn't it?" said Moriarty.

In almost perfect unison, John and the twins shot the sniper's weapons out of their hands, and heard the sound of metal skidding on the concrete, and into a storm drain: skreectictic-whoosh-plop. "Well that's that." said John. He turned to Sherlock. "And you're welcome." Completely ignoring his partner, Sherlock said, "So, Mr. Moriarty, what do you plan to do now?"

"I plan to make you fall. You will fall. Your kingdom will fall. For now, though, I am going to go make myself some tea. Au revoir Sherlock Holmes." and with that, he turned and started to walk away, but was stopped by John.

"Don't be silly, Sherlock doesn't have a kingdom. He has an empire."

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**And that's the end today!  
**

**This is Carmen, here what she has to say: *Clears throat* I CAN SWING MY SWORD SWORD SWING MY DIAMOND SWORD SWORD!You can not afford, ford, -**

**CH: Oh, that's great. Bye now!**

**Carmen: There was a horse, named...Greg.**

**Bye. BYE DOODS! :3**

**CH: Okay... bye.**

**-CH**


	6. Chapter 5 On Fainting and Stuffed Otters

**Carter here- This is the shortest chappie ever! Yay!**

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**Chapter 5-On Fainting and Stuffed Otters**

"How silly of me, Sherlock doesn't have a kingdom, he just has you." replied the surrogate paternal unit, "But before I go, the twins left something at 'home'." Moriarty produced two identical stuffed animals from his pocket. He moved towards the children, but Sherlock stepped in front of the twins to retrieve them. Sherlock swiftly took them from Jim's hands and gave them to the twins.

"Oh, right!" Carter remarked. "How could we have forgotten you two?"

"Erm," began John, "What exactly are they?"

Nox turned hers around in her hands to face further inspection, it could be seen that lthese stuffed animals were otters. More specifically, otters wearing blueish purple scarves.

"They were ours when we were little,' Carter explained.

"It was a little clue, a cute little problem for them to solve, I thought they might like it." said Molly, who seemed to have woken up and recovered enough to speak. Nox and Carter looked from their father to the stuffed animal and back again.

"You know, there is a very large similarity between you and this toy." Nox observed.

Carter looked back and forth between the toy and her father.

"Huh. That is strangely correct, sister," she said.

"I do not look like an otter!" Sherlock exclaimed. He turned to Moriarty. "Now why ELSE are you here?"

"I said I would burn the heart out of you, and burn I will," replied the assassin. He turned, opened the door to the flat, and left.

Carter said, "That is enigmatic. That was textbook enigmatic."

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**Please review!**

**-CH**


	7. Chapter 6: A Brief Goodbye

**A/N: SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY OH MY GOOOOOODS WE'RE SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING THIS!**

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**Chapter 6: ****_A Brief Goodbye_**

The children now turned towards their newly found parents.

"So…" began Nox. "What now then, eh?"

The three adults turned to one another.

"Yes," continued Carter, "where will we stay? What will we do?"

Sherlock looked around Molly's small flat. "Until further notice," he began, "I believe the girls shall stay at Baker Street." He glanced at Molly. "I suppose you should stay in the guest room as well. You are their mother."

Molly blushed. "Yes...I suppose so...let me just gather my things together. I could be ready to um, move in for them in a few days."

"Of course."

John looked between the two. Molly was reddening, and Sherlock remained seemingly impassive, as though he hasn't just asked the woman who had been pretty obviously crushing on him for ages to move in with him. "Right…"said John to Molly. "So, I guess we better return home." He gestured to the kids in the room (Sherlock counted as a kid as well).

"Obviously." said Nox.

"Yes…"said Molly. The twins could tell she was unsure how to say goodbye. Carter and Nox looked at each other for a moment, in silent conversation. Carter gave a barely perceptible nod to her sister. Together, they calmly walked over, giving their petite mother a hug. Molly smiled and returned it.

After the girls broke apart, John hugged Molly as well before leading the twins out of the pathologist's flat.

Only Sherlock now remained. "Well, goodbye Molly…" Sherlock looked unsure whether to hug her or not, seeing as he wasn't the hugging sort, but decided to just give her a nod."Goodbye." he repeated. He turned and walked to Molly's oak wood door. He turned for a moment, hesitating. "And Molly?" he asked.

Molly's heart fluttered. "Yes Sherlock?"

Sherlock, paused, seeming to be trying quite hard to find the right words. "Molly...thank you...for...helping me take care of them." He turned and left before Molly could respond, joining the former army doctor and twins outside.

Molly blushed a bit, putting a hand to her forehead, feeling where he had very briefly kissed her. She stared at the place the Belstaff coat had vanished from a few seconds ago. She softly replied to him, though she knew he couldn't hear her. "You're welcome, Sherlock Holmes."

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**Yep, so no, this is NOT the last chapter. The last one will be posted probably next week. And warning, it might be a ****_bit _****unsettling. IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THE REICHENBACH FALL YET DO NOT READ THE NEXT CHAPTER!**

**Also, sorry that this was so short. We knew how we wanted it to end, so this is really sort of a filler.**

**-CH&NH**


	8. Epilogue: 3 Months Later

**Epilougue**

**3 Months Later**

Carter and Nox were in a complete shock. They were let out of their private school early, which normally was when their father wished to have their opinions on a case.

When their classroom's PA speaker came on, announcing their leave ("Would the Holmes sisters please report to the front desk for early dismissal?"), Carter had looked over at her sister and grinned. Finally, something to relieve their boredom! They left their English class, smiling ear to ear, making their way to the front office.

When they saw John in the office, the smiles faded for a second, but quickly returned. It wasn't their dad, as they had hoped, but he must have been busy, already investigating the case.

But when they got closer to John, Carter nudged Nox smile clearly faded. Her look clearly said, Something is wrong. Nox looked again at John, closer this time. John's eyes were red and his face was blotchy. He had been crying. He looked awful, as if he belonged in the back of an ambulance with a shock blanket.

He looked up from the spot on the floor he had been staring at, putting on a brave face as he noticed the girls approaching him. He gestured through the office door to a taxi waiting outside. The girls followed their silently. What was going on?

"Uncle John?" said man turned from the window view back to the girls.

"Yes, Nox?" he replied a bit shakily.

"What is wrong?" Nox was quite frank.

John swallowed. He opened his mouth, but no sound came out. He tried again. "Sherlock…" he paused for a second. "Sherlock...your father…" he tried to continue.

Carter attempted to speak gently to him, as their mother would. "Yes Uncle John?"

"Your father….he's...he's.." John lowered his head, not daring to look either of the other passengers of the cab in the eye. His voice, barely a whisper, spoke. "He's dead."

**Roses are red,**

**Sherlock's blood too,**

**John's voice rings out, "He's my friend, let me through!"**

**The flat is now silent, all filled with dread.**

**The grieving voice begs, "Just please...don't be dead."**

**A/N:Yeah...sorry. Sequel? Thoughts? **

**CH & NH**


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